Time to be nostalgic and look at the artwork I painted when I was in love and loved back, and heart broken.

 

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Bathroom princess was commission as a gift of Love from a man to his woman.I was so grateful for him paying me before even starting I really had outdone myself.

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Heart break. This artwork is about heart break and how I felt when I found out I was being lied to. Nothing left to say,  people  had even tore this painting for me out of jealousy.

Stripper

This  Stripper is about a girl,  just really wondering what to do with her life. If there is a better life elsewhere or with someone else.

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When I was loved, and still loved. How a person can mark your skin and change your dynamic like a tattoo.

Bath

Painted this when pregnant. Waiting for Levi.This painting is about transformation.It is a bit odd as it seems like she is drowning, and bitten by snakes but  this artwork is about the magic and pain a woman feels during pregnancy.

SUNFLOWER

An artwork about relaxation, fulfilment, passion and beauty. I called her sunflower, but this is my recurring theme of  Venus. Life is good.

 

 

 

I didn’t write long paragraphs about each painting  But I decided to group them for today to look at how I changed during the years.

Love is  the most powerful emotion for us  humans and being an artist, I have to acknowledge that it has been a driving force in giving me inspiration for a lot of my works.

 

 

 

About being Quixotic.

 

 

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I always wanted to be an artist because I was good at drawing and I used to think that it would have made me rich. Hate me or love me for it, I had always been motivated by the big pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. Little did I know that  one can get lost on rainbows.

Seems like  I  underestimated myself.  Dedicating my life to the brush and colours  made me become this quixotic natured  artist.  I sometimes hate myself for being so idealistic and chivalrous but I really can’t help it. And although I try to kid myself that I am in this game for the money, I just am not….

This  is an old painting of mine. It is called Ghost. The girl in the picture is my aunt. She killed herself at the age of 32. She was beautiful to look at, but her life was marred by tragedy ,loss, disease and heart break. I was 17 when she passed away. People still look at me and say to me that I look like her. It doesn’t bother me at all. She was so beautiful.

She is the biggest regret in my life. I feel that I could have saved her if I  had shown a bit more love. She was so misunderstood and so unlucky. Even her wedding day, was a spectacle to forget. She  married out of despair and had such a horrid little poor gathering ,not even her wedding dress was nice. She so deserved much more than life had offered her.

So I decided to paint her in a wonderful wedding dress, with swans and angles looking down on her, with lovely flowers in her hair among the stars and she loves it. This is my gift of love to her spirit watching over me.

This is the great thing about being an artist. Sometimes you can do things you wish you could have done  and heal a wound. Sometimes you can show love in a way you could have never been able to express in words or actions.

 

 

 

 

About Constellations and Stars, and Astral Projection

 

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One of the things that helped me cope with  the incredible heartlessness of this world, is

meditation.

In my meditation , I travel  the Universe and navigate through different galaxies

Although I always go back  to my favourite star,  lately I have been

going around and seeing amazing things. Sometimes I also meet other travellers like me

out there. I am not the most seasoned of travellers … but I invite anyone , to close their

eyes when in bed and think of the stars. Maybe you won’t manage to  do Astral

Projection, but if you just picture yourself outside  in the universe looking down on

earth, you would be overwhelmed by it’s beauty.

Before dear reader, you think I am odd, be aware that travelling  with the stars  has

been a shamanic practice for native Americans since many moons . One should  also

keep in mind that someone who travels at night in his sleep, has many beautiful things in

his head to ever be let down by common human  needs of material goods.

Stars just make everything more beautiful.

This painting is my response to a vintage  porn cinema poster  of a movie called When

Girls Undress.   I have been working on this painting for over 2 years now. Only now did

I decide to give this stripper a touch of the Universe  to help her out of the murky world

she is living in  and also make her more beautiful , giving her more  dignity  and show

the rest of the world that these women, are just people like us and they shouldn’t be

forgotten.

We are one  with the Universe. We have no right to disrespect, to hate and use other

people for our pleasure.  We are meant to live together in love and peace.

And for all those who have a painting of mine and there is star there, then you now

know where it comes from.

 

On Being An Artist and a Mother

 

 

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I am not a great writer and will never be,  but I still am going to use the power of the internet and jot down in words how it feels to be a mother and an artist other than my colourful artworks.

It feels AMAZING .

Yes it is wonderful being the mother of such an amazing child and yes I do not have as much time as I used to  to paint, but the few minutes I  do, are more powerful than ever before.

I would  also like to take the opportunity to say thank you in this post.

I want to thank my amazing mother and father for giving me ongoing support and for loving  their grandson so much.

I also would like to thank my friends who have given me support in hard times  .

I would also like to thank the people who tried to destroy me and ravage all my work and efforts when they found me weak and unable to defend myself. You have showed me a side of  humanity that I didn’t know existed and I dedicate the above painting to you.

Your lies, your deceit, your masterplan in making me look bad and destroy my family when I was pregnant and when I had just given birth  just made me stronger.

This artwork is about  just that- The inner strength, the magic and the powerful force of nature that I had to summon in order to come back and gather the strength to come back  and be who I am – a lion.

Thank you